life values

If you could save the one person you looked up to the most, would you – even if it put you at risk? Initial instinct for me says yes. Afterwards, I still say yes. Should it have been a harder question for me to answer?

Does that make me seem like I don’t value my life? Because the truth is I do. I just finally feel that I’m at a place where I’m just “okay.” I satisfied with what I’ve done in my life. I’m not proud of everything I’ve done in my life, but I’ve accepted it. For the most part, I feel like I’ve had a pretty damn good life – better than most.

Of course I want to do more, but if I don’t get that chance its okay, because to me it would be work the risk. Maybe I see things that way because I really don’t have much on the line. I don’t have a husband, significant other, or for that matter even a boyfriend. I don’t want kids. At this point, I really wouldn’t care if I didn’t get married for the rest of my life as long as I am happy. Maybe it’s because I care more about my career than all of those other things. If I don’t do those other things, I’ll be fine. But if I fail in my career, I’ll feel like nothing. The thing I want most is to be successful in my career. I want to be so good that I can lead other people. I want to teach other people so well that he/she will be better than me.

So is that why I am so I’m not sure how to put it but “frugal” with my life?