Do you ever feel like sometimes there’s just too much noise?
I’m not just talking about the sounds of vehicles, children or video games. I’m talking about noise. Even the noises in your head. (I’m not going crazy, I promise.) Sometimes there are just so many thoughts going through my head - from the daily things I have to do to the decisions I must make.
I have had such a hard time blocking out all the noise. Sometimes it so much that I can’t even hear myself.
Now I’m finding that there are these rare instances in my life where I’m able to block out the noise. (It all started a couple of months ago.) I don’t think about anything else but the present - the here and now. It makes things so easy.
Life really isn’t hard. Just live for now. I keep saying this over and over again, but I haven’t been this happy in a very long time.
6.10.2008
6.08.2008
handicap perks...
I am so bored. I’m so ready to go back to work. The highlight of my week was riding the cart in my favorite grocery store, Central Market. I figured since I’m handicapped I should take full advantage of it. I already begged my doctor to give me a note or something so I could get a handicap sticker, but he said I wouldn’t qualify.
But riding the cart wasn't bad at all. It was nice being able to breeze down the aisles faster. People just kind of move out your way. I did get looks though. All the kids kind of kept looking at me. But I’m just going to chalk that up to beauty. Or maybe they just wish they could have driven the cart, hehe. The only bad part is having to reach for the items on the top shelf or out of reach. But did I get first-class service at the check out line. The cashier at the 1 through 10 item line let me checked me out immediately (even though I had about 20 items).
She said, “Don’t get up. I’ll get everything. You just rest.”
It was great. She put everything back in the cart’s basket and told me I could use the cart in the parking lot. I was having a good time, until my cart ran out of battery in the middle of the street. Thank goodness no cars were coming, or I would have been road kill. I had to get out and push the cart to the side. Being handicap is so hard…
But riding the cart wasn't bad at all. It was nice being able to breeze down the aisles faster. People just kind of move out your way. I did get looks though. All the kids kind of kept looking at me. But I’m just going to chalk that up to beauty. Or maybe they just wish they could have driven the cart, hehe. The only bad part is having to reach for the items on the top shelf or out of reach. But did I get first-class service at the check out line. The cashier at the 1 through 10 item line let me checked me out immediately (even though I had about 20 items).
She said, “Don’t get up. I’ll get everything. You just rest.”
It was great. She put everything back in the cart’s basket and told me I could use the cart in the parking lot. I was having a good time, until my cart ran out of battery in the middle of the street. Thank goodness no cars were coming, or I would have been road kill. I had to get out and push the cart to the side. Being handicap is so hard…
6.06.2008
on the wrong foot...
Just when I thought doc/nurse and I were getting off on the right foot (pun intended), boy was I wrong. I’m so mad. I went to the doctor for my follow-up appointment today. The doctor wanted to take a look at the foot and make sure everything was okay. He did and everything is fine. I even got good news. Doc said he didn’t have to cut nearly as much as he thought he would have to therefore, I should heal a lot faster. So he’s hoping to get me out of the boot and into a tennis shoe in four weeks, instead of the five he initially estimated before the surgery. That was the good news.
From there on, the entire appointment went downhill. First off, I’d like say, I know I’m not an easy person to please, especially when I spend hundreds of dollars on something. I feel like I am doing you a service my giving you my money, specifically $574 of my money. So you better do a damn good job.
The day after the surgery I noticed my third toe wasn’t hurting. It should have been because they were supposed to take the knuckle out of the toe since it rubs up against my shoes. It was one of those minor things that the doctor suggested I go ahead do while they were doing the bunionectomy. It’s not necessary.
So imagine the way I reacted when Doc basically told me he forgot to operate on the third toe. Then he tried to blame it on me. Doc said he wasn’t sure if he was supposed to operate on that toe. When he came into the operating room that morning, he talked about the big toe and I said ok. Since I didn’t say anything about the third toe, he didn’t do anything once in the operating room. Doc also said, “and it wasn’t on the paperwork. And if it’s not on the paperwork, I can’t do it.”
That’s where he is wrong. It was on the paperwork. I brought the freaking paperwork to the surgery center that morning. It was on there. I also didn’t like the fact that he tried to put it on me. I'm so mad.
Then he tried to mitigate it by saying, well I can give you a local anesthesia and do it in the office real quick. Hell no, I don’t want to do it in the office while I'm awake. I wanted you to do it all at once while I was under the first fucking time. I don’t want to be in pain a second time. Grrr…I was pissed.
Then I asked the nurse if I could have a smaller boot, because the one they gave me at the surgery center was way too big. I had already tripped over my foot twice in it. She gave me one that fit perfectly to me but she said it was too small and I may hit my big toe on it. It’s better than me tripping over my own foot and falling over. Now that’s going to hurt! They cut me at the top of my foot, not on my toe. Hell, I tripped on the way to the X-ray room at the doctor’s office. I was fuming by the time I left the office. Shit, I’m still mad.
My mom and dad recommended this doctor. In fact, he did foot surgery on my mom last year and it turned out really well - no problems. But of course, with my luck something always gets screwed up. I think I’m going to find a new doctor.
From there on, the entire appointment went downhill. First off, I’d like say, I know I’m not an easy person to please, especially when I spend hundreds of dollars on something. I feel like I am doing you a service my giving you my money, specifically $574 of my money. So you better do a damn good job.
The day after the surgery I noticed my third toe wasn’t hurting. It should have been because they were supposed to take the knuckle out of the toe since it rubs up against my shoes. It was one of those minor things that the doctor suggested I go ahead do while they were doing the bunionectomy. It’s not necessary.
So imagine the way I reacted when Doc basically told me he forgot to operate on the third toe. Then he tried to blame it on me. Doc said he wasn’t sure if he was supposed to operate on that toe. When he came into the operating room that morning, he talked about the big toe and I said ok. Since I didn’t say anything about the third toe, he didn’t do anything once in the operating room. Doc also said, “and it wasn’t on the paperwork. And if it’s not on the paperwork, I can’t do it.”
That’s where he is wrong. It was on the paperwork. I brought the freaking paperwork to the surgery center that morning. It was on there. I also didn’t like the fact that he tried to put it on me. I'm so mad.
Then he tried to mitigate it by saying, well I can give you a local anesthesia and do it in the office real quick. Hell no, I don’t want to do it in the office while I'm awake. I wanted you to do it all at once while I was under the first fucking time. I don’t want to be in pain a second time. Grrr…I was pissed.
Then I asked the nurse if I could have a smaller boot, because the one they gave me at the surgery center was way too big. I had already tripped over my foot twice in it. She gave me one that fit perfectly to me but she said it was too small and I may hit my big toe on it. It’s better than me tripping over my own foot and falling over. Now that’s going to hurt! They cut me at the top of my foot, not on my toe. Hell, I tripped on the way to the X-ray room at the doctor’s office. I was fuming by the time I left the office. Shit, I’m still mad.
My mom and dad recommended this doctor. In fact, he did foot surgery on my mom last year and it turned out really well - no problems. But of course, with my luck something always gets screwed up. I think I’m going to find a new doctor.
6.05.2008
real pain...
I thought I had experienced pain, until Monday morning. The anesthesia wore off the most horrific pain I’ve ever encountered set into my foot. I took the Vicodin the doctor prescribed 2 hours earlier but it still hadn’t kicked in. Thirty minutes later the nurse called me back to tell me to cut slits in my bandage because it was probably too tight, since my foot swelled up more. I was also given the go ahead to take my migraine medicine to try to get rid of the pain. An hour later, I felt much better. I slept practically the rest of the day. That was my worst day after the surgery.
I guess you could say the surgery went well. I wasn’t actually awake for the procedure. The last thing I remember is the doctors pushing me down the hallway in the gurney. Dr. H., the anesthesiologist, just asked me if the meds were starting to work. I told him I wasn’t sure if it was the meds or the bed moving that was making me feel weird. Then the next thing I knew, I woke up and a nurse took the breathing mask off of my face. It only took about an hour, so the actual surgery wasn’t bad at all.
The only thing I knew was that had all males operating on me with the exception of one female. It was interesting because I had never seen so many males in the operating room. I had a male nurse, male doctor, male anesthesiologist, another male who walked in there to introduce himself as someone who would be in the room, another male doctor who was assisting my doctor and then there was an Asian female who would be helping. Don't get me wrong, I'm not complaining, as we all know I love males, but it was interesting. The other thing I do know is that they must have strapped me down while I was sleep, because when I woke up I notice an indent on my upper thigh. I guess they didn't want me to move. It was weird because I didn't remember having the surgery, yet it was evident I had it because my foot was in a blue boot now.
Unfortunately I haven't been able to walk until today. It still hurts a little, but more when I walk. I’m supposed to get this surgery done on my left foot too, but I don’t know. Monday was pretty horrific. If I could avoid a Monday like that I’ll be fine. But if there’s another Monday like that one, I’m not so sure I want to have that surgery again. Maybe it’ll be worth walking in pain on the left foot for the rest of my life.
I guess you could say the surgery went well. I wasn’t actually awake for the procedure. The last thing I remember is the doctors pushing me down the hallway in the gurney. Dr. H., the anesthesiologist, just asked me if the meds were starting to work. I told him I wasn’t sure if it was the meds or the bed moving that was making me feel weird. Then the next thing I knew, I woke up and a nurse took the breathing mask off of my face. It only took about an hour, so the actual surgery wasn’t bad at all.
The only thing I knew was that had all males operating on me with the exception of one female. It was interesting because I had never seen so many males in the operating room. I had a male nurse, male doctor, male anesthesiologist, another male who walked in there to introduce himself as someone who would be in the room, another male doctor who was assisting my doctor and then there was an Asian female who would be helping. Don't get me wrong, I'm not complaining, as we all know I love males, but it was interesting. The other thing I do know is that they must have strapped me down while I was sleep, because when I woke up I notice an indent on my upper thigh. I guess they didn't want me to move. It was weird because I didn't remember having the surgery, yet it was evident I had it because my foot was in a blue boot now.
Unfortunately I haven't been able to walk until today. It still hurts a little, but more when I walk. I’m supposed to get this surgery done on my left foot too, but I don’t know. Monday was pretty horrific. If I could avoid a Monday like that I’ll be fine. But if there’s another Monday like that one, I’m not so sure I want to have that surgery again. Maybe it’ll be worth walking in pain on the left foot for the rest of my life.
6.01.2008
duck hunt...
Its been about two months and the ducks are still here. About two weeks ago as I was leaving for work, I saw one of the ducks in the middle of the road. I ran to get into my car, started up the engine, revved it up, but as soon as I got down to the street, he had moved -- right in front of a car. That damn bird! I would have hit the car if I tried to hit him. Grrr…I was so mad.
At least the birds stayed out of the pool for my graduation party. But that was only because people were in the pool. I say "out of the pool" because the night before they circled our house and decided not to land after they saw my cousins 9-year-old son in the pool. I swear they keep a watch on our house.
So after a reader suggestion I contact Bird-X, Inc.. They have some neat stuff, but much of it is very expensive. After talking to one of their staffers we decided an affordable option was buying a fake gator and putting it in the pool. So we did that last weekend. The gator’s eyes light up and even a light breeze will keep gator moving around the pool. I have to say it worked for a while. That is until one morning we woke up and a duck was in the pool with gator.
This morning again, there were two ducks in the pool with gator playing with him. As soon as I saw them I went out there to shoot them with the Co2 gun. They left feathers all in the pool. Those damn ducks! There’s only one real affordable way to get rid of them for good.
At least the birds stayed out of the pool for my graduation party. But that was only because people were in the pool. I say "out of the pool" because the night before they circled our house and decided not to land after they saw my cousins 9-year-old son in the pool. I swear they keep a watch on our house.
So after a reader suggestion I contact Bird-X, Inc.. They have some neat stuff, but much of it is very expensive. After talking to one of their staffers we decided an affordable option was buying a fake gator and putting it in the pool. So we did that last weekend. The gator’s eyes light up and even a light breeze will keep gator moving around the pool. I have to say it worked for a while. That is until one morning we woke up and a duck was in the pool with gator.
This morning again, there were two ducks in the pool with gator playing with him. As soon as I saw them I went out there to shoot them with the Co2 gun. They left feathers all in the pool. Those damn ducks! There’s only one real affordable way to get rid of them for good.
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)
